As I recall, the summer that I turned the tender age of three years old, Mom took my brothers and me on a rare trip to a beautiful, clean lake in Northeast Indiana. It was a sweltering hot day with a few whipped cream clouds drifting overhead in the sun-baked, blue sky. It was a perfect day to go swimming with family, so that’s exactly what we did. We met my favorite aunt and her kids at a lake near their home.
We were greeted with a warm, gentle breeze as it made sparkling ripples on the surface of the lake. Mesmerizing! It was also REFRESHING. My older cousins and brothers were busy playing in the deeper water, while I entertained myself by picking up pretty stones in the shallow water along the sandy beach. I noticed, with great disappointment, that when I took the stones to Mom, they would dry off and lose their pretty shine. Then, I discovered when I got them wet again, the shine would come back…for a little while. So I made several trips back to the water. Each time I did, I found more pretty stones that caught my attention and delighted me. The water was so clean and clear that, even though I was about knee deep in the water, I could still see many dazzling stones on the bottom of the lake. One by one, I was picking them up and putting them in my hand, but I also kept dropping them, as my tiny fingers could grasp only two or three at a time.
One time, I reached down to get an especially beautiful nugget, and my face went under the water. WOAH! I stood back up quickly! But, I really wanted that stunning beauty! So, I tried again. This time a water monster grabbed my head and pulled me under and held me there! I frantically pushed and pushed against the bottom and tried to get my head back out, but the water had a strong hold around my neck. I couldn’t breathe! The WATER was choking me! Suddenly, I felt someone grab me and free me from the lake monster’s death grip. My savior was one of my older cousins. She had seen the whole, horrible thing and rushed to save me from that deadly monster. I was coughing…and crying…and terrified! And perplexed at why that nice, pretty lake would be so mean to me. I didn’t ever want to go near the water again. However, my cousin gently coaxed me into sitting with her at the edge of the shallow water. As the lazy waves licked at my tiny toes, I eventually calmed down and was no longer terrified. But I still had been indelibly marked.
Many years later, after I had grown up, I thought back on that eventful day and decided to talk with Mom about it. She was surprised that I remembered it at all, since I was so young at the time. She even thought I may have been two years old, but no matter how old…I distinctly remember it! I have now learned that tiny minds sometimes see things totally different from reality. After my conversation with Mom, I have been able to understand what ACTUALLY transpired that day.
I was standing knee deep in the water. As I bent over to claim my treasure, a boat had come by too fast and too close to the beach, which created a large wave that hit me. Being only two or three years old, in water to my knees, and facing toward the deeper water, the wake caused me to topple face down into the undulating water, and my little arms were too short to get my head above the surface. Thank God, my cousin was close by me, witnessed me fall, and sprang into action immediately. I now recall Mom and my aunt yelling at some people in a boat. At the time, I didn’t understand that they were mad about the boat speeding too close to the beach and endangering those of us in the water.
What I have learned from this episode is the importance of understanding that our childhood memories can be very different from the truth of the event. Some events can be so traumatic that our minds will totally block the memory from our recall, yet have a profound effect on our mind, will, emotions, and behavior. It is SO very important how that trauma is addressed at the time. Had my cousin not taken me back out into the water and sat with me there, I may have never remembered it and still have a phobic fear of water and drowning without even knowing why. All these many decades later, I’m still grateful for her swift action and her wisdom to gently encourage me to face my fear on THAT memorable day, because TODAY I can truly enjoy relaxing in a sun-spangled lake, seeing and feeling the lazy waves wash over me and the smooth, dazzling stones strewn along the beach. No more fear of the lake monster!
~ Rose Lehman
~ Image by WOKANDAPIX from Pixabay
